Is trying to look good after 40 too hard?
August 24, 2009 by JoJami Tyler and Deborah Boland - The Glam Gals
Nicole looking FAB after 40
What if we told you, Stop worrying about the way you look…that after 40, you should just relax and stop caring?
That’s what they’re saying at this week’s Blogging Boomers, on The Joy of Aging. We’re horrified by the tips they are giving out, especially this one, below:
1. No one cares how I look, so I don’t need to primp or go clothing shopping.
We could NOT disagree more!!! Not “caring” is not an excuse to walk out the door looking sloppy.
As many of you know, The Glam Gals’ favorite saying is, “Life is too short to be frumpy”…
To start a discussion about this, and read other posts on a variety of Boomer topics, visit the Blogging Boomers Carnival. This week’s host is The Boomer Chronicles.
I’ll tell you,the number one person that cares about how I look is myself.It feels wonderful to be fit,strong and healthy.It’s deliciously carefree to dress oneself with style and taste and walk into any situation feeling confident, at any age.I’m 51 and holding my own!
Esther,
Good for you! You are our kind of Gal!!! We are sure you are one FAB woman~
When we stop caring about how we look, then we stop caring about us. The trick is finding the fine line between being confident, working with what you have and being defined by your looks. At one level, it gets easier as we get older. At 57, I know no one is going to try to pick me up when I go to the grocery store. On the other hand, it takes much more effort to maintain and it’s easier to say, “no one cares how I look, so why should I?”
It’s a great topic and certainly worthy of much more discussion.
Hi Cathy,
Yes, this is one of these topics that is a fine line. After 40, the “life balance” concept seems much more important and we agree that we should have it. How that plays out is an individual journey. Your state of youth is a state of mind. We love to have a “going to the grocery store” outfit ready at all times that we slip on and feel good when we have to do that boring chore!
If you want to hang on to your husband or significant other, and keep a little passion in your life, you better care about how you look because he will. In any case, I am way too vain to just let it all go, but admit at 47 it is getting a little harder to keep it all together.
In my 20s I enjoyed fashion and looking good. For much of my 30s I was a stay at home mom of preschoolers, and sometimes pregnant or breastfeeding, and my looks were much less of a priority. Now I’m 46, kids are school-age, and I am enjoying a personal renaissance of looking stylish and looking good.
I’ve been reading about the fashion approaches of women from other cultures. According to what I have read on various websites, French women are generally acknowledged to always look good. This is partially due to the fact that they do make it a priority to dress with care and style, and to be sure that their hair, makeup, etc. are attractive, at all times, even when going to the grocery store. They do not want to relax and stop caring after they turn 40. I’m trying to let French women be my inspiration!
I would be interested in hearing from someone who has spent time in France if this assessment of French women is accurate, and, how do they do it?
Hi Lisa,
Yes, we agree it gets harder every day to keep ourselves looking fresh and updated. But that is why the Glam Gals are here, to help give you inspiration just that!
Let us know what you want to hear more about and any suggestions you might have on how we can do a better job of helping!
Cheers!
I live in France, and French women truly are an inspiration! With my 42nd birthday occurring this year, I decided it was time to do something about my weight. I changed my eating habits and began exercising, and in 6 months I’ve lost 30 pounds. I look and feel better now than I did throughout my 30′s!
Congratulations Megan,
That’s wonderful. I’m sure everyone wants to know..how did you change your diet? Was the was the biggest thing you did differently?
The diet change was easier than the exercise! I just quit snacking, and cut most alcohol for 4 months. Now if I need a snack during the day, I grab a handful of almonds or a piece of fruit. The bread and cheese combination here can be addictive, and I found myself giving into the cravings way too often! I slowly added back in a glass of wine 2 or 3 times a week, but no more than that. Now that I am exercising regularly, I find that most foods are just fine in moderation! French women don’t deny themselves the wonderful treats available here, they just have small amounts!
Well Megan, that sure sounds like great advice!!! Moderation can be tricky as we age because we might not realize that we are not as active and that we don’t really need as big as portions. Also, you mentioned watching out on what we snack on… yes!! that is a good one!
Thanks, we agree that we don’t want to deprive ourselves but we also do want to look and feel the best we can! BTW….You look FAB!!!
xo
The Glam Gals
Stop caring after 40? That’s INSANE. You would have to be depressed to even think up such a phrase. “No one cares how I look.” Sounds like resignation that one is unworthy and useless. Only the crazy and clinically depressed don’t care what they look like.
Unless you’re trying to continue looking 21, upkeep past 40 is not anymore an ordeal than it ever was. Exercise, eating well, a good skin care regimine, hair, mani-pedi, wearing the latest fashions that flatter you and most importantly a good attitude!
Sure, this culture gives more attention to the young women. But plenty of men are interested in more mature women – that keep themselves looking good. And you do not have to be 25 to look good, no matter what Hollywood would have you believe. Look at the French! They believe in and celebrate the allure of mature women.
And if you want to feel good, if you’re still interested in romance, don’t surrender your feminity and sexy and the alter of ageist attitudes our society holds about women over 40. I know I haven’t. I’m over 40 not 100. Why would I want to live the rest of my life as if I was half dead already?
Hi Elle,
Sorry to say, many women do feel this way. One of the biggest inspirations for writing this blog in the first place is that both Deborah and I have worked with so many women that feel that they have lost touch of their style and feel there is not a lot of inspiration out there to help them keep up to date. However, we are certainly glad to hear that you are feeling confident! Keep up the great attitude!