10 Sure Signs You are Looking Frumpy after 40

Do you look in the mirror and Feel like a Frump because you know that you’ve let yourself go. Trying to pinpoint exactly what it is that’s making you look so old so you can finally do something about it? Then read on to learn The 10 Sure Signs You’re Looking Frumpy after 40:

1. You look like you are wearing a Tent

Baggy clothes that hide your entire body make you look old and matronly.
Show off the parts of your body you still like (for: example your bust) and cover up only the parts you don’t (your hips). Don’t use oversized clothes as a gigantic blanket to hide behind. Switch to more fitted clothing (but not tight) if you want to look fresh and with it.

2. Yellow Teeth

A big turnoff and a telltale sign of age despite how great you may look otherwise. Flash them a set of shiny white teeth and knock ten years off. These days it’s easy with at home whiteners or dentist laser treatments that restore sex appeal.

3. Dated Glasses

Still wearing those hokey glasses you bought ten years ago? Time to tweak your chic with some updated glasses. The trend now- buy at least two pairs—one that is dressy and one that is casual and fun and switch them around to look modern and fashionable. Be sure to take a stylish friend along with you when you make your choice. It’s easy to get stuck in an eyeglass rut and end up buying much the same thing you had before.

4. Dull uneven Skin Tone

As we age our skin starts to fade and years of sun damage from too much tanning begins to show up on our face as dark brown spots. You can even out your skin and restore its natural glow with cosmetic peels, and even laser resurfacing treatments. An added bonus- fine line and wrinkle also seem to disappear as the new layer of skin is revealed.

5. Scary Lips

Halloween is over! Ditch the bright lips which are too strong a contrast to aging skin and hair and try wearing soft natural shades in pinks and peaches. And as for those dark lined lips that make you look like a vampire- when were those EVER in? When you walk in a room you want people to think how beautiful your face looks, not how hideous your lips look. Read more

What does an age-appropriate leather jacket look like? (Part 2)

Sizzling Snakeskin: Snakeskin has been all the talk this season!  We liked this one from Chicos because it is reversible! Snakeskin on one side, solid on the other…so two jackets for the price of one! $349.00 (Chicos)
Oh yes to Classic with no zippers or buttons!  This gorgeous jacket has it all right! the simple collar flattering pockets the hidden snaps make for a simply perfect piece! You would not go wrong to splurge on this!  (Saks)
The Open Style, soft and feminine! This olive cropped piece is one of our favorites. It is made of super soft thin leather The lines and cut of this jacket would be flattering on most. Can be dressy or casual the long “V” neckline keeps this jacket from being bulky (Nordstrom)
Short and sweet!  See how this jacket is all vertical lines.That is why it is such a flattering jacket! This would work best on a petite or small busted gal The neckline is high, but would look great open or with a scarf. It is short-waisted so if you have a hard time finding jackets to fit your body type you’d love this one! $339.00 (Nordstrom)
Red means Romantic! Do you have an urge to walk into a room and get a compliment?This jacket would be a sure bet for that! One note though… not all reds look good on everyone, this one is a blue-red, so those with cool undertones to their skin need only apply! What a deal! We were shocked when we saw the price was only $212.00 (Neiman Marcus)
Dramatic Hipster! Black leather is always a strong statement and you can make it look very rocker or, like this, super sexy and just plain HOT!$298.00 (Nordstrom)

This is a big, NO! ~ and when “Sale” becomes a bad word!  We went to one of the most fashionable sites and found this jacket “on sale.”  No wonder no one wanted to buy it… The color of this jacket would best only on dark skin, otherwise it could wash you out, like it does this model. The pockets hit at a terrible spot, especially if you have large breasts Then sleeves and waist with wide elastic is just not chic. Just think how this would look if you had a little “tummy”?  Worst of all, this jacket even has epaulettes, which does not really go with the style of this mishmash coat. This is a fashion disaster and not worth it at any price! If you are tempted to buy a jacket just because it is a great price, think again!! No matter what the cost you should love and adore your new purchase!(Shopbop)
Flattering for the Curvy Gal!  Super flattering for those Glam Gals who have some curves!  This simple design still has lots of flair to it!  See how it is cut to hit a little longer near the thigh  The stripe trim on the sides has a wonderful “nipped in” illusion!  Plenty of room for shoulders and bust However, it’s little pricey at $598.00 (Saks)
And Finally… A GREAT PICK or is it? If you want to have some fun, you can try a leather vest!  JoJami has one that she has worn with a long sleeve top in the winter and come Spring with a tank top.  We thought this one looked pretty nice and the price is right at $128.00. However, when we noticed that it was only given 1 star.. we found several bad reviews including this one…”I ordered a small but it was too big especially in the hips and waist.  The fur looked like it came off a cheap gorilla costume. Bummer. It looked great on the model online.”This is why we love Nordstrom because they actually print honest reviews!(Nordstrom)
Nordstro

How to be smarter about dressing better

Now that you have your closet all tidy with a few empty hangers just begging to be filled again…

Our next idea is a novel one.   Get ready, you’re going to have to be really open-minded for this!

This dress is classic and worth the splurge!

Here’s the scoop:

Recently we were working with a client who had made the decision to dress better.  You see, she had recently changed jobs and  lost 30 pounds.  She felt like a new woman…and looked great.  Since all of her clothes did not fit anymore, it was time to change things up.  But how?

Here’s what we suggested: establish a budget and then pick only 1 or 2 gorgeous pieces that you love and adore.  That sounds simple but it really isn’t.  You see, most of us would NEVER think of spending a lot of money on, say, one dress or one pair of shoes.  We would rather buy multiple items on sale and feel good about getting a deal.  The problem is when we just keep filling up our closet with things that are not of the highest quality, they tend to look cheap.

It may sound crazy but sometimes Neiman Marcus, Nordstrom and the rest of those really expensive stores have super-duper sales.  They mark down items that you would never in a million years think of buying full price, or even looking at. We’re talking about things like a Prada purse, Chanel top or a pair of Tori Burch shoes that can go on sale, big time!!!

Here’s what happened:

Our client had been to a conference where she had seen one of the speakers  wearing a simple dress with a shiny buckle that said Prada.  She thought the woman looked very classy and went home to see if she could find the dress.  It was expensive – $825!   Moreover, it was a style of dress that she never pictured herself in before.

This is the self belt to the dress

However, a year went by and she happened to be back at Neiman Marcus and saw the exact dress on the sale rack.  She went in and tried it on.  It fit perfectly and she felt wonderful in it because the fabric was gorgeous and it was so well made.

Done. She was going to go for it!

It was still a lot more money than she would have ever spent on a single dress, but  she thought of all the ways she could wear it and all the events she could wear it to. Still feeling guilty, she bought it anyway.

Here is a similar version of the dress in black from Neiman Marcus

This is totally normal by the way.  If you are not used to buying top quality clothes [paying big bucks for an item can be a hard pill to swallow.  You will have buyer’s remorse for a while, so just expect it.  You should remember, though, that if you have picked something classic and simple, a piece that you feel like a million bucks in and know that you can wear it a lot, you will be glad that in the end you went for it.

Our client has worn her dress a few times already and has no regrets. She feels it  was totally worth the splurge!

Of course you can apply this same ideas to a designer item at a consignment shop or an outift on e-bay at a fraction of the original cost, but it will take some extra time and effort.

This is just one style shopping tactic of many.  Have you ever done this?  How did you feel?  Were you glad you did?

Comment below:

More casual dressing using color blocking!

On the road, Glam Gal JoJami is now in New Orleans, lapping up all the good food and music at the infamous New Orleans Jazz Festival!

Howdy from the Big Easy… today I was walking in the French Quarter and spotted these two adorable Glam Gals having lunch.

We had just done a post on color blocking and I just thought this red white and black combo was so striking I asked Libby Lowres (age 55) if she minded if I snapped a few photos. She was game!!!

Ends up she is currently living on the Fiji Islands! HOW COOL IS THAT?

These classy black flats are from New Zealand, how cute are they!!!

As I stared dissecting her outfit, the red jean skirt,black flats and Prada purse , it was like a treasure hunt!!

Then I noticed the red reading glasses on her head….”Oh put those on, they are wonderful!!!” I squealed with delight!

"Oh you might want to see this...my crystal iphone cover!"

Next I spotted her red watch and asked her about it.  ”How funny, I just picked this up a few minutes ago, oh here you are going to love this….”

She opened up her purse and out came a red crystal iPhone cover!!!

This fabulous Prada bag, "...was a gift from my husband!"

Just then, Libby’s friend, Carolyn Leaney (age 51)  from Auckland, New Zealand sauntered up to see what all the commotion was about!

“I just did a blog about summer dressing in all white and here you are, a wonderful example!”

“Ha!, I’m so thrilled you think so! My 18-year-old daughter was recently stopped on the street in New Zealand by a fashion blogger, now I can tell her that I was too!”

Needless to say, these two Glam Gals were having a blast and looking fab while out on the town!!!!

Carolyn is a great example of how to sport the "all white" look for summer!

These oversized sunglasses are just the ticket to making her look chic!

These little sparkle sandals were perfect with her outfit!

Are these shoes too sexy for an over 40 gal?

"What do I wear with these?"

Dear Glam Gals,
My husband bought me these amazing shoes but I don’t know what to wear them with to update my look. On one occasion I wore them with leather pants and a flowing orange top. They are nice shoes but sit in the box a lot.
Thanks for any advice so I can use these shoes.

~Colleen

Hi Colleen,

Maybe it’s  never dawned on you, but our gut feeling is that your spouse really didn’t buy these shoes just for you.

These are for strutting around  in the bedroom! Just think, they would match the “pole” perfectly!!

But seriously… he sounds like a true sweetie to buy you such hot shoes! Best of all he must think you are super sexy!!

However,the problem with these shoes are two-fold. The  silver part is a bit on the shiny side (would have liked to have seen them in black or muted gold with the leopard)…and frankly the two tones (warm~animal print and cool~silver) are fighting with each other.  But not to fret….we think you can make them work!

Here’s how:

• try tight, straight leg, pencil jeans
• a white t-shirt
• jean jacket

These shoes are definitely bold, and so if you wanted to add color:

• they would need to be paired with a top that has cool tones, like blue or fuchsia
• you should wear them with some over the top silver jewelry (like a wide cuff)… or some rhinestones!

They are flashy, and so you really shouldn’t take them too seriously, therefore would not wear them with leather pants and don’t feel guilty if you hit the town in them only a few times a year.

Meanwhile, wear them as much as you want for your sweetie!

Ladies…What do you think she should wear with these shoes?….Also, why not send us a picture of you in your sexiest shoes and we’ll post it? Don’t be shy.

Please comment below:

Are these shoes age appropriate?

It seems that many of you gals are still a  little skittish and questioning if some  of the new shoes out are age-appropriate or not.

Here is a recent letter:

Morning Ladies!

I am 47, and I live in the land of the “plastic ladies” – affectionately known asOrange County, CA!It’s tough to find age appropriate clothes and shoes in my area, so I do a lot of online shopping!

I like the rock n roll look of these shoes, but I don’t want to pushthe age-appropriate envelope.The shoe description of “metal rings” and “woven cage-work”, are intimidating me.

Thoughts?

~Linda

These shoes are very cool and are fine for any age, as long as you put together the right outfit with it! Where you live you would certainly look hip and fit right in in these shoes. Moreover, they look super comfortable and have good support for a high heel!

One suggestion, most cream or white shoes can be tricky to find the right outfit to go with them and not as versatile as the black so if you had to choose one, go with black. (*see comments below for more discussion on this!)

Speaking of that, you could wear black opaque hose with the black pair but you would have to go bare legged with the cream.

Good luck and please send us a photo of you in them!!!

Shoes that are age appropriate

Hi Deborah and JoJami,

My friend and I  met you a few years ago when we attended the More Reinvention Convention.
You wanted to photograph us for your blog, but we had to leave before you had time to do it.
We have been following your blog ever since. Thanks for all the great info.

I saw your post about dressing too young and you mentioned extreme platforms as being too young.

This shoe has great style and is age appropriate for any age!

I wanted to know what you thought of this shoe for a women at my age of 53. I have a bronze colored sheath
dress that is very simple and am looking for a pair of shoes to wear with it. I found these at Nordstrom and
thought they had some style, but wonder if they might be too much for my age. I don’t want to look silly.
I don’t know why, but I struggle with this issue lately. (I am size 4 petite.)

Looking forward to hearing your opinion.

Thanks,

Donna McArthur

Hi Donna,

Your  shoe is absolutely fine and certainly age appropriate. We really like platforms like this because it gives the illusion that you are wearing a very high heel, but the platform makes it more comfortable!  The shoe below is similar to yours, but would look too young for a nice cocktail party.

This shoe from Steve Maden, looks a little young.

Since we wrote that article about extreme platforms being too young, platforms have become so much more “mainstream” and so are not as trendy as when they first came out. Funny how that styles that seemed  extreme when they first come out, once they are around a while, don’t feel so wild and become more mainstream.

Shoes are one accessory that can really help you look more youthful. We think it is easier to make a mistake of buying a shoe that is too matronly vs one that might be too young.

Have fun at your party!

What does dressing “age-appropriate” mean

Dear Glam Gals,

I personally hate the term, “age appropriate”.  I think you should wear whatever makes you  feel sexy whether you’re 23 or 63. I’m 23 in case anybody’s wondering. My mom is only 45 and she always feels she has to wear ‘age appropriate’ outfits and she’s miserable in them and spending hard earned money on them. So, in my opinion, if you feel comfortable wearing for example, thigh high boots, then wear them. Don’t let society pick your wardrobe. Age is just a number.

~Bianca

We are SO glad Bianca, that you brought up this point! We get gals writing to us wondering if there really is such a thing as age-appropriate dressing?  For example, here’s a common question…

I am now in the best shape of my whole life and wondered if I should enjoy the fact that almost all clothes look terrific on my new body, or should I take my age into consideration when choosing new outfits?

~J. Janet

Let’s face it … This whole Age- appropriate is a tricky thing to to figure out.  Should you change/limit the way you dress after a certain age? It’s not a black or white issue…but our bottom line is no…it’s not about a number. Style is style, however, you also need to be realistic about your changing body and the message you want to send at this stage of your life. These things should also influence the clothes you select.

For us, Age- appropriate dressing  (classy, youthful, modern) is based on a combination of 3 things:

Are you dressing, too old, too young or just right?

1. Your body
2. Personality
3. The message you want to send

Think of  that story of  Three Bears…you know,”too hot, too cold and just right!”

How do you know if you are dressing too old, too young or just right?

You need to take a look at:

Your Body Type:

The better your body, the more you can get away with. It is jut the way it is. If you have gorgeous toned legs then a skirt a couple of inches above the  knee, rather than at the knee, can look great, but a thigh high mini is overdoing it. Is your waist still there and is your stomach decent? Then you might be able to get away with a two piece bathing suit like Helen Mirren does.

Things to think about when it comes to your 40+ body and dressing it:

• Are you showing the same amount of skin a 17 would?
• Are your skirts at your thighs?
• Do you have large breasts and are you showing too much cleavage ?
• Are your pants so low we can see your back fat and behind?
• Are you wearing too many sexy elements at once (super high heels and short skirt and strapless top)
• On the flip side, if you are curvy, don’t hide in a bag…buying styles that work with your body type  can make you look 10 pounds thinner!
• For any body type find styles that have darts and shape to them. Wearing boxy, boring clothes is a recipe for feeling unfulfilled with your wardrobe.

A good rule of thumb is, if you feel like you look too sexy or too matronly, chances are you probably are! (It is amazing how our gut feelings can be helpful at steering us in the right direction!)

Personality:

We all have different personalities and it is important we express our unique selves. If you are the creative type – you can still dress creatively, romantic?..no need to give up romantic looks, sporty?- stay sporty no matter what your age– dramatic?- that’s still who you are, so why change your style.

The key is to just tone it down a touch so you don’t look like you are wearing a costume. Young gals can get away with more costume-like style. You need to dress true to your personality, but classy too. Classy says mature and mature means you know the score.

Bianca (comment above) said her 45 year old mother was wearing clothes were age-appropriate, but they made her feel old. YIKES… that is NOT dressing age-appropriate!  It sound like she is following a frumpy formula that says I’m a certain age and have to dress it. How sad that she is not  dressing in a way that lets her personality shine through.

Another thing to take into consideration when it comes to dressing in an age appropriate way is…

The message you are Sending at this Stage in your Life:

For us the biggest message women over 40 should send out is that they are Age-mazing™. In other words…mature, smart, classy, vibrant and fun.

• Mature means not going overboard with trends.
• Classy = Quality. Try to buy clothes in the finest fabrics  you can afford. Luxury can be comfortable and look great!
• Smart = Wearing clothes that fit properly-not too loose or too tight & shopping for the right brands in the right stores. (No junior departments) If you scroll through our blog we give lots of great examples of age appropriate clothes.
• Vibrant=Being true to your personality. By adding color, accessories and interesting pieces you will reflect who you are, where you’ve been and where you plan to go in the future.
• Fun= Not taking all the dressing “rules” too seriously or taking life too seriously.

We’d love to know you thoughts. Is there such a thing as age appropriate. How do you define it?…. we want to discuss this with you!